Today's children live in a world where social media and online communication have become an integral part of life. But with convenience comes FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) — an obsessive fear of missing out on something important. If your child is constantly checking his phone, is nervous about missing messages, or comparing himself to others, he may have run into this problem. In this article, we will discuss FOMO in more detail.
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What is FOMO
FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is the fear of missing out on something important, the excitement that other people are having a more interesting or valuable experience at the moment, and you are not.
This condition is often associated with the active use of social networks, where people post only the “best moments” of their lives, creating the illusion that everything around is great except you.
How does FOMO appear?
FOMO can influence a child's behavior, emotions, and even physical well-being. This is how this fear manifests itself:
No.1. Behavioral manifestations
✔ Compulsive social media checking is a constant update of the feed, even if there is no news.
✔ Inability to put down the phone — fear of missing a message.
✔ Participation in events “for the sake of appearances” — attending parties, concerts or meetings not because of interest in them, but for fear of missing something or to share it on social networks.
✔ Procrastination and reduced productivity — instead of working or studying, a child can use social networks to “keep up to date”.
✔ The need to multitask is to view stories, chat rooms and listen to music at the same time, because “you have to do everything”.
#2. Emotional and cognitive symptoms
✔ Anxiety is the worry that something important is happening somewhere without you.
✔ Envy — thoughts like, “Everyone's so cool and I'm wasting my time.”
✔ Dissatisfaction with oneself is the feeling that one's own life is boring and incomplete.
✔ Irritability if you have to put your phone down (for example, at school).
✔ Cognitive overload — the brain gets tired of the constant flow of information, but it's hard to stop.
#3. Physiological reactions
✔ Sleep problems are the habit of checking social media before going to bed or even at night.
✔ Tiredness and headaches — due to information overload.
✔ Increased levels of cortisol, a stress hormone released during anxiety.
#4. Social consequences
✔ Superficial communication — instead of live meetings, people switch to correspondence and likes.
✔ Relationship conflicts — partners or friends may get angry because a person is constantly on the phone.
✔ Social isolation — the desire to “be connected” leads to loneliness, because real communication is being replaced by virtual communication.
#5. Long term impact
✔ Burnout syndrome is emotional exhaustion from trying to “do everything”.
✔ Decreased self-esteem — constantly comparing yourself to others destroys confidence.
✔ Addiction formation — the brain gets used to constant dopamine “strokes” from likes and notifications.
How to fight FOMO?
FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) is not just a habit but a deeply rooted pattern of thinking that is fueled by today's digital culture. To deal with it, we need an integrated approach. Here are detailed strategies to help your child:
No.1. Help understand the FOMO mechanism
Explain to your child that social networks do not show reality, but an “idealized” version of life: people publish only successes, hiding failures. Our brain compares our own “behind-the-scenes life” to someone else's “catwalk”, and this causes a feeling of inferiority.
#2. Practice digital detox together
Help your child by asking them questions: “What do I really lose by not checking social media for an hour/day/week?” , “How often is what I see in the feed really useful to me?” Keep a diary of observations together: write down how many times a day you reach for the phone and what emotions it evokes.
#3. Limit your time on social media
Use special apps that help you limit the time you spend online. Remove social media apps from your phone, leaving only the browser version (this will make access more difficult).
#4. Optimize notifications
Disable all push notifications except for the really important ones (messengers, calls). Use grey screens (monochrome mode in settings).
#5. JOMO Development (Joy Of Missing Out)
Learn to enjoy the absence of online noise. Practice conscious loneliness, for example, reading paper books without a phone nearby, walking without headphones, watching nature with your child.
#6. Create offline rituals
For example, rituals such as waking up without scrolling social networks and keeping a gratitude diary are suitable.
#7. Dealing with the fear of “missing out”
Learn for yourself and teach your child to accept the fact that you can't be everywhere and do everything on time.
Helpful question: “If I miss this event, what happens?” (usually nothing).
#8. Focus on your own goals and values
Identify personal priorities and help your child do that.
Make a list of “What really matters to me?” together (Career, family, hobbies, health?). Encourage your child to compare how much real time it takes to view social media and the priorities on the list.
#9. Replace FOMO with FOLO (Focus On Living Offline)
Plan real events (meetings with friends, hobbies, travel). Record your own achievements (instead of comparing them with others).
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